Missing

Posted on 21 Jan 2025 @ 7:56am by Lieutenant Commander Raviran Dattek-Winters

574 words; about a 3 minute read

Mission: Shoreleave and Reassignment
Location: Ravi's Quarters
Timeline: Not long after "Thoughts...."

It was such a harsh time. SO many people to miss and so many regrets as to things she *might* have said or done but now could never do it over. It was a bit pointless and negative to regret those kind of impossible thoughts but also natural.

Ravi would enter a room and expect to see a face or look at her schedule and have to close the file on so many follow ups but it was all in a day's work of survival and "Professor Retrospect" who was a very clever fixer of "what if" scenarios, but a mean purveyor of unsolvable regrets so he had to be acknowledged and then banished.

There was however, one person left who hadn't died but was still lost to her and that was Vaat. She had loved him and planned a future together with him........ Or had she? Had he actually been 'together' in that plan with her?

She was hurting for having lost him, that was a real and certain thing but he had left without even saying goodbye or leaving her a note.... not even a recorded message. He hadn't been too hurt physically, apparently, like so many and with an overwhelming number of injuries to still attend to, the CMO knew she shouldn't feel so bad about not having time to seek him out once he was on the Starbase, but she genuinely didn't have a chance and she thought, naturally, that there would be time when she could, later........

And when later wasn't even here yet, he was gone. Just gone. Was he even thinking about her when he left?

"OF COURSE HE WAS!" she chided herself silently. But in actual fact, although she couldn't know this, he had barely given her a thought more than that he was starting afresh and appointing his new department staff and celebrating his luck at having been appointed to the USS Goddard.

Just as well Ravi didn't know that, although perhaps it might have helped her to forget him if she had realised how little she featured in his thoughts and how he had NO intention of including her in his plans either. She could have been deeply hurt but at least she wouldn't have been wasting her sympathy on him and if she had got angry, that might have cauterised her fractured heart sooner, but she was denied even the solace of the truth and continued to feel sad and hurt and sorry for him.

Later when the truth did finally reach her, Ravi was tough enough (from her Cardassian side) to rise out of it and phoenix off into her own future without him but until it would arrive, she still had tenderness in her heart and concern for what he might be going through. It didn't help her to deal with everything else that she had to deal with and missing Vaat was an unknown drain on her wellbeing but...... how was she to know how little he had really cared for her?

Perhaps it was actually better that she might never find out? Who knew at this time, life was going to work itself out whatever she knew or didn't and for now, the information wasn't available to her.

She had enough to contend with as there were still injured to tend to and so life prevented her from dwelling on the faithless former fiancé she had once had.

END

 

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